New Life

At last my course transer had approve by the very "efficiency management "of UTAR
Kampar.. other than cyber cafe i dont know where is other entertainment
so just stuck in the room doing nothing and sleeping again be my favourite past times.
here, bicycle is the main transport for students
thousands bicycles you can see in the campus
the distance to campus quite far
once you reach the campus
sweat like a cow
worst for fat people like me
haha
good exercise though
going to meet new friends and new environment
expecting something really good and nice things happen here
now just having trouble whereas
don't have assignment groups since i just transferred to new class
hope everything will be done soon
new housemates isn't that friendly
and i do love my X housemates from KL
things really get happening and fun there

study..
hopefully i can be better here
the FAILED words hopefully don't exists in my results anymore
kind of afraid of it already

Strange

tomorrow my course mates going start year 2 semester 1
but i will be going sitting at home
hahaha
waiting news from kampar
don't know why they are not efficient
took so long to approve
sigh..
wait and wait..
just like a ship in the sea
with no direction and without light tower
just follow the waves and wind

Quit..

UTAR SETAPAK
-THE END-
i gave up in engineering course already
there are so many doubt and uncertainty
but need a solution for it
so i choose QUIT.
tired of life studying that course
this is the mistakes of my life
i am not really sure what i going to do next
but please hope YOU give me strength to move on
and start achieving things that i never achieved
will power and determination
i am looking for you
I am sure lots people will look down at me
especially customer in my dad's shop
and other friends even relatives
yes, maybe i isn't work hard enough
maybe i took a easier path which is quit
but just go ahead with your thought
i am always being look down by you all
since i was a child
i bear with the annoying customer
which always thought their children will be better
but i am living with my own life
now i just want to have something
a qualification
a certificate
so i move to other course which is marketing
hopefully they accept my application

KAMPAR,UTAR
-A NEW LIFE-
looking forward for it
will it bring a dramatically changes in my life
if i manage to study there
lots things need to be forgone
my interest as a coach as part-time and my players
sigh.. kind hard survive without extra income
meeting new friends, hopefully not the typical Chinese
found it a lot in Setapak which make me not close with them
going to miss my house mates which bring me joy whereas never get in university
if i FAILED here, i think i STOP here
so this really determine my future
can't afford to make another mistakes
miss the engineering course but too bad i can't coupe with it
only despair
so marketing, always have interest there
just need figure what am i going to study
brain brain please assist me this time
i need you for 3 years

Anyways
YOU are my inspiration
YOU giving me strength
YOU giving what i needs
so thank you.

Sorry to my dad, and mom
i disappointing you all as usual
being the most worried son
wasting 15k for a mistakes
hoping one day can make u proud like how my sisters and brother make you
but too bad i am always the failure
habit of study not in me
but trust me
i will once again try have the habit
it takes times

-Wish me luck-
-Guide me success-
-Give me strength-

One more hell to go, Three weeks of heaven awaits me

Monday is my last paper
but don't know why can't really focus
sigh...
this will be a hard paper as well.
just don't understand through reading take me hours to understand
guess what you cant get tutorial answer from notes
stupid notes lecturer give.
sigh.
digital digital..
somebody save me..

3 weeks of holidays
how to spent without $$
haihz..
unique University
break when none of others break
having break alone
fcuk man

Day before 3rd paper

spending whole day studying without knowing anything
really dunno how to take the paper tomorrow
is this THE END
i am still wondering

2nd paper

today paper
what can i conclude?
yesterday aim 25% forgone
75% do
50% aim
today 54% dunno
46% know
score how many out of 46%
unknown
screw everything
things i purposely miss come out
things i focus and do all hiding
done tutorial 134
out 2 and 5

just sick and tired
two more days another day headache math II for engineering
just DIE once and for all

Labor Day

everyone having off today
but for Utar's students there is no off day
everyone doing revision for the next day paper
sigh, having 3 more papers left mean there is 3 more weeks
dynamics, math for engineering II, and digital electronic
tomorrow having dynamic exam
brain kind empty
it is not pure reading, it need analyst the questions
12 chapters; give up 3 chapters
25% of final forgone
75% left
50% aim
so, am i capable of taking the 50%
hopefully yes
now going sleep
wake up at midnight later
continue the process of jamming stuffs into the brain
BRAIN BRAIN...
PLEASE INCREASE YOUR CAPACITY
LET ME BE SMART FOR THE SECOND DAY
haha

Memories

this is the second present i received in my life
haha, damn sad right whole life receive few presents only
this toy already 2 year old, from karmen and yee chien.
this things using solar power to move his head..
nod..nod...nod..
2007, i having SPM
so ivan and i happen to be studying together
this thing will be at the middle of our table
when both of us bored
we stare at it..
and laugh..
we just ask some stupid question..
"ivan is stupid"it nod
"kit yuan sohai" it nod
etc....
haha.. both of us are so lame
however, it also can motivate you..
like..
"Am i the smartest"
"Can i do it"
lol.. just depends what type of question you are asking :)
till today, whenever i study at home, this tiny things will be on my table
whenever i stuck i will have a look at it
^^
refresh the mind by thinking back the past
and too bad.. just a while
need back to studies after that

really thankful
to these friends who bought this present for me
and celebrate my birthday with me
that was the 1st and last till today
appreciate it
:)
thank you

A HARD Moment

another day just passed,
guess what..
my brain still empty
two days trying studying dynamics
ended with blur and even more question mark occur in brain
really makes me give up and tired. sitting 3 hours ended with nothing

just now went canteen in UTAR to do revision straight after dinner around 8
settled down and started to read DYNAMIC
getting stress and depress from time to time
and suddenly.. PARENTS call
dad start the conversation first then mom
dad asking about my condition thought i having paper today
mom concern about my cloths enough or not, asked me wash cloths and etc
and..
"are you studying"
"progress fine ma"
"better don't like last semester"
"empty paper and get few grade "F"
dunno why, at this Moment..
why this Moment
when i getting frustrated of studying
they called..
body just numb and can just listen to my heartbeat
feelings of scared
i feel sorry for them for not making them proud
working days and night at shop for their children
and what on earth i am doing
being a student who cannot even passed exam
being a son who does not work hard enough
being a rubbish and wasting tine
i am so useless until don't understand the syllabus
the Moment i giving up but i thinking of YOU
i will, no i must try my best
having few days left
still can make the difference

******FINAL******

at last..
the day has come..
my final exam
it really will be a very very long month for me
nothing can be done now
just hoping everything will be fine
no failed papers again
already SCARED...
wish me ALL THE BEST
=D haha

give me the strength
give me the sign of hope
let the light shine along my path
bless me with wisdom and knowledge
get over this final